How I Almost Ruined My Marriage:Pampers in the Pew featured on Bible.org

Here I go again opening up about personal things lol I’m glad my husband is cool with it! Click link below to learn more…




A day in the life of…

So I decided to do some picture journaling to show the different facets of my life. I am a Believer, a Wife, a mom of 3 under three a Minister and the list goes on. Don’t get my wrong I don’t think that droves of people are biting their nails waiting to see what I fed my children today, but I always get questions about how in the world I manage to raise these kids work full time support my husband and write on the side with a smile on my face. So I figured I would chronicle the reality of a day in my life. Granted I don’t think it makes for life changing journalism but I do have some pretty cute kids and some life hacks you may find helpful soooooo drum roll please here we go… enjoy

6:00am- the hubs is getting ready for work I’m off today since I worked Saturday and Sunday (#ministrylife) I am faced with the choice to send the kids to pre school or keep them with me to redeem some quality time that I’ve spent chasing down ministry partners to give them commemorative pens.

The verdict is in I’m keeping all three today!!!! So we feast on cookies bananas and peanut butter in my queen sized bed and watch far too many episodes of Ninjago!

This is Lily 2 years old 20 pounds and a force of nature! This pic pretty much sums up the tude she’s been giving me all morning.

Meet Jude 3 years old and he thinks he is a Sithlord he walked around like this saying “look mommy I’m a Star Wars” this boy is silly and brilliant and refused to follow directions!

Ok it’s about 11:00 I’m feeling pretty good about myself by now. Why not start dinner #crockpotlife as a busy mom family 5 on a budget I cook  a lot to save money and I enjoy it. But I’m not going to lie gone are the days of roasting a rack of lamb with mint jelly all while wearing pearls. I do have my go to meals; I try to make them all quick or fix and forget so my crock pot gets a lot of mileage. Today I was super lazy about it and didn’t want to make gravy which I usually pour over he chuck roast while in the slow cooker. I crossed my fingers and hoped for the best

Dishes done (check) stare at the rest of the house and pretend I’m going to clean it (check) Note to self why are there so many toys! Like way too many!

My kids are not veggie eaters so I’m always looking for ways to hide them in their food. I made this homemade tomato soup a week or so ago with lots of pureed carrots. I make it in bulk, pre seasoned with onions and portion it out in freezer bags. I throw it in my spaghetti for added veggies or defrost it for the kids’ lunch like I did today. I’ve got lots of little baggies of what nots in the freezer and none of them are labeled so actually putting this practice to good use is like a fun game of hide and go seek! It’s like my Pinterest side meets the real me and we all just close our eyes and hope for the best!!!! 

Enter stage left my newest addition Joey! He’s adorable and cuddly and honestly I am self conscious about how much time he spends in this rocker. Managing everything else in this life I find myself wondering if I’m short changing the youngest I only hope I don’t mess him up and that my friends are real mommy thoughts unscripted. (Yes my carpet is terribly stained! Between potty training spot cleaning, spilled apple juice and water bottles I think I may have given up)

Ahhh Mommy’s gotta eat too!!! I made myself a grilled cheese on the side figured the kids had enough carbs that day. Lol really I had enough carbs too but something special just for me gives me moments to hold onto where I feel like an adult. (Yes that’s a kid’s spoon don’t judge me)

I try to take time to enjoy the little things. My soon started meticulously staking his toys in the dinning room I would typically tell him to stop but both he and Lily were captivated by their new task. (New rule never interrupt a captivated toddler) this random pile of things including my shoe and a war tank my son called a birthday present for me! He was so proud so I took the bait and paused to enjoy him a bit.

One huge poopie 2 baths and three breast feedings later we find ourselves on an adventure to the doctor. All three kids and myself have been suffering the wrath of winter colds. After doing everything I’ve been told to do I figured I better just take them in to the doc to be sure. I’m worried they will see this mom of three as a newbie and wonder why I brought them in for a viral cold. Why do I even care about their opinions anyway (By the way #teampetty came out during our drive, this is a pic of a new QT which was built recently my husband and I argued about if the new gas station was a QT he said no I said yes I win! What what lol real life marriage goals include rubbing things in your spouse’s face)

At the doc with the three littles is it just me or does everyone stare at us wherever we go. Maybe I’m just making it up out people look at me with half pity and half elation. BTW this was before they got the flu shoot, notice the smiles 🙂

Cup number 3 of coffee today this time in ice form. Honestly I didn’t feel like I would make the drive home the exhaustion is slowly encapsulating me.

Overall the kids do a pretty good job while I’m out. This is not a coincidence but it’s the result of intense prep. First we have a come to Jesus meeting in the car before we get out about how they will be on their best behavior and not embarrass me. I come fully stocked with medium sized toys not small ones! I repeat not small ones! They will be every where. And most importantly I try to communicate with them about where we are going and what will happen next. A lot of acting out by toddlers is caused by not being able to control their environment every moment is filled with surprises and new discoveries so I try to cut down on over stimulation by over communicating. In this case I kept going over why they were getting flu shots what would happen 1st 2nd and 3rd and it worked like a charm!

3 sick kids 2 shots and 2.5 hours later we shut it down! Parking lot of the doctor’s office is empty!

7:30 a little late for dinner time guess the lazy gravy I made was a hit as you can see clean plates. Although we did bribe Jude to eat his food with the promise of a cookie they say you’re not supposed to do that… I say who ever made this rule is clearly not trying to feed a toddler on a regular basis

My hubs makes bomb homemade cookies it’s a simple joy and probably one of the reasons I have yet to loose the baby weight! lol I grab two after dinner I have now lost count of how many I’ve had I’m headed to sit down and relax for one of the first times in hours while the hubs preps the kids for bed and folds laundry.

Getting in some time with the lord is tough with three littles but a pre bed praise break with the kids gets my focus back on Christ! This is Jude praising as we watch CCM videos on YouTube.

Screen shot of article I scrolled through during my sit down break. This one caught my eye because I’m always wondering if my relentless coffee addiction is ruining my liver! Turns out according to this article which may or may not be a reasonable source, it’s not!!!! What what via le cafe!

Bae makes the kids fly before bed!

Hubs brushes their teeth I nurse the baby, he gets them in their pjs, we pray we sing or goodnight song, and Tuck them in bed.

The Hubs and I go from kissing each other tickling and whispering about the night time events to transpire to being a little bitter at each other because I thought he insulted my cleaning (which by the way I haven’t been doing very well-but hey don’t you dare say something about it lol) he says he wasn’t. We are still a little distant he goes to bed I plop down besides him and nurse to the office a moment of peace and quite in the dark after a busy day


Running to my Husband & Running to Christ

I cried watching “Tarzan King of the Jungle” a couple of weeks ago. In fact I cry quite often and I celebrate if I make it 2 days without some sort of meltdown. What causes this you may ask? Well…. I am 6 months pregnant! I work full time! I have a 1 year old, We stretch our money at the end of every month and it never seems like enough! I have a fantastic husband, who like all spouses, can sometimes find the worst time to say the worst thing and tip you over the edge of sanity.

This is real life. This is marriage.

I have always been a private person when it comes to crying. No I don’t want you to hold my hand, pat me on the back or hug me tight. Mid meltdown I just want to curl up in a ball in an empty room and cry my eyes out, as I think about how stupid it is that I am crying over situation X (Insert overly dramatic non life threatening situation here)

My husband and I “had words” as the old folks say…I felt the tears welling up in me. Maybe because of the shame of vulnerability, or because I felt the victim and he the guilty party, maybe because of my pride, and maybe because I love him too much to let him see he has hurt me. I went to my bed room and cried. I let it all out, I tried to do it quietly so that he won’t be alarmed but loud enough so he may hear and take pity on me.

What do I want any way? How would I like to see this meltdown resolved? Is separating myself from my husband only drawing me deeper into a pit. So I prayed… Because that is what I do. In a still small voice I felt the Lord calling me out of my private hole I had dug for myself.  Forcing me step by step, to bare my insecurities, my fragility, my hurt.  I want to be strong, strong enough to be offended and be able to give my husband the silent treatment. But… I also want to be weak, weak enough to let myself be held by the one I love, comforted by the very one I felt caused the pain.

So I hesitated, I saw my husband playing his X box, which is his way of escape. Maybe even sometimes his secret hole when things get tough. Although he has told me before that if he is playing a game and I really need him, I can interrupt him, I have never believed it. “He’ll get upset,” I thought, “He’ll have to back out of a game with live players.” Just more of a reason to shrink back into my solitude.

But my mind was made up, along with the encouragement from my heavenly Father…. “Run to Him!” you are hurt,  you are crying, you are stressed, you think you have hurt him, you believe he has hurt you? “Run to Him!” You think he won’t want to be bothered with you? You think he is the one who should be running to you… I don’t care “Run to Him.”

And so I did, tears streaming down my face I timidly tapped him on the shoulder. Somehow the very person I wanted to be farthest from, I wanted to be nearest to as well.  He did seem annoyed… I told him “I need you.” “For what?” he said confused, mid game. “I just do I need you!”

I almost allowed his annoyance at my vulnerability give me an excuse to run and hide again. To allow my pride Lion to roar and say “SEE I told you to stay quiet, stay hurting, stay to yourself.”Silhouette woman run under blue sky with clouds

But I pushed past it. Nothing, not even my husband, was going to stop me from running to the one I loved and needed.

So we sat, I held him tight, I nuzzled under his arm pit, where my head seems to fit perfectly. He didn’t seem engaged, he wasn’t sharing the moment with me. But I didn’t care. I held even tighter, I wrapped my arm around him, I began to stroke his hand, I held on to him for dear life.

Slowly his body began to lose its tension, he held his head back and looked up to the sky. I didn’t have to tell him what was wrong. He never asked. Somehow, we both knew. We knew that my tears were about more that our little argument. We knew that we had each other, and we knew that it would pass.

After minutes in this divine encounter, like many men would, he got up and declared “I’m Hungry, want anything babe?”

I knew it was over. The storm had passed and suddenly all of the weight of life that was pressing me, was lifted from my shoulder. All because I ran to the one who I was trying to hide from.

I learned a profound lesson that day. Isn’t this what we do with God too? When we sin we believe he is disappointed in us, that he hates us and we hide our face. Or when we experience tragedy we feel as if we are the victim and God the offender, and we run from Him.

But what if we muster enough strength to climb out of our hole where we hide our pain, our shame and our guilt? What if we Run to the Lord baring our fragility and throw ourselves at Him, knowing that somehow He can take the pain away? What if we Run to Christ like I ran to my Husband?