I hate opening up about stuff that’s embarrassing but when it may bless someone else I am down 🙂 share, like comment here is a quote from the article- “My search for value also created a deep divide between my sisters in Christ; instead of assets to my personal walk, I saw other women as benchmarks that either challenged my worth or affirmed it because I personally devalued theirs. ”
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Hey there! It’s been far too long! Here is a post about marriage straight from my heart. It may challenge your conventional thought but I thought it was worth a second look. Click below to read the article and let me know your thoughts.
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There I was walking that long path to the university yet again. I knew every crack in the side walk. I knew where the weeds had finally broken free and where the deep puddles would collect after a hard rain. I could gauge how late I was to class based on the faces I met scrambling along the way. Guys and gals who drank way too much the night before drug their inanimate bodies to their 7:45 classes. The skaters, which was still a thing then, weaved in and out of the crowd, I had to fake left and fake right to escape them. Every day I would walk that path to those lofty red brick buildings almost floating, sometimes skipping and always with a smile plastered on my face. Rushing for final exams, my homework may or may not have been done, a guy running to class spills his coffee on me, but none of it altered the feeling of elation that seemed to be my cocoon.
As is tradition every year around my birthday I pen something about the great wealth of wisdom I’ve accumulated since last year… (Cough cough add sarcasm here) If there is anything I have learned from this practice, it’s that whenever I start to believe I am at a pinical of understanding God is quick to show me that I’m fooling myself.
This past year has been full of life! Changes in my job, new opportunities, a new little one expected to join our family, giggles, laughs and milestones. It’s also been one of belly ache crying sessions, the ones where deep groans seem to erupt from your inner being, it’s been full of tiered days and frustration, dinners that have gone un-eaten, screaming matches lots of humility, lots of love and a ton of painful growth.
That’s life though a milue of good bad beautiful and lovely. If you are anything like me when you look back on a year lived in this life the good parts and the bad parts seem to fuse together leaving behind a haze that reminds you that this existence of ours is real. The point is that crying means you care deeply, pain shows that you feel with intensity, fights mean that you are surrounded with people to fight with. Being smeared in more baby poop than you could’ve ever imagined means that you have been trusted to care for another human.
I can’t clearly separate the good the bad and the ugly of my last year. If anything when I look back I see evidence of my humanity, my fragility, my image being formed into Christ, I see pain that teaches hope, I see lack which teaches gratitude, I see beauty, I see God and a glimpse of my own eternality in him.
May of us have been taught that doubting what you believe in comparable to a deadly sin. But I find that Jesus takes a gracious approach to the doubts of his followers.
After 3 years of a miracle filled ministry on earth, the disciples saw Jesus dumbfound the religious rulers of their day with his clarity in teaching the scriptures. They saw the dead restored, sickness healed, demons driven out food multiplied, manipulation of the wind and the waves and to top that all off they heard Jesus speak with his own words that he would be crucified and rise again. Here they sit as Jesus is about to give his final word, in his resurrected body after having shown himself as the risen Lord to hundreds of people and we see that some doubted.
“Then the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain where Jesus had told them to go. When they saw him, they worship him: but some doubted. Then Jesus came to them and said, All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all the nations baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”
To the very end! Some doubted! But notice that Jesus doesn’t rebuke those who are having wavering thoughts. We know he knows the hearts and minds of men and could have easily called them out.
Instead he knowingly reassures them that because He is God incarnate, because He is the promised one that He has all authority in heaven and on earth. He comforts them by telling them who he is then gives them a charge to spread the word based on that authority!
What a beautiful picture of God’s gracious heart toward man. Truly we are like sheep led astray but being the good shepherd he is, He doesn’t rebuke the sheep but he takes his time to bring them back into the fold.
So right about now those of you who know me or those who just operate on common sense are probably doing a “Say what now?!” I admit there are not many things that would make me put the word hero and Kim K in the same sentence.
But my honest truth is that she really is a model for pregnancy for me. Let me tell you why…
She wasn’t blessed with a “cute” pregnancy and that’s ok!
Yes I know all pregnancies are beautiful but lets face it some ladies have that perfectly round ball and no fat that appears any where on her body! People asked me all the time if I was going to do a pregnancy photo shoot. My answer was no! I enjoyed feeling baby move inside of me, I enjoyed the pregnancy attention I got but I did not love the way I looked. In my first pregnancy I never seemed to pop out! In fact I got wider and wider until my belly button just collapsed on itself. I was ok with that but I didn’t have the picturesque pregnancy that you see in magazines and neither did Kim! So a real life famous person had a baby bulge instead of a baby bump and the world got to see that this is a beautiful pregnancy too! Work that bulge Kim K! You are a trail blazer for wide pregnant women every where!
She had cankles and the world needs to learn about this! Stop telling lies to young aspiring mothers every where! Your feet will grow and heels will spread and they may never come back!
Ok I will not tell a lie this was a tragic choice of foot wear on her behalf. However this happens in pregnancy! This is what many moms suffer through before the bouncing baby comes! Kim K! Work those cankles and try another shoe but good for you!
She is not afraid of having babies back to back!
Come next May I will have 3 kids 3 and under! I love my life! I love my Kids but to most people you would think that I have somehow lost my mind having so many children back to back. Here are the top front runners of strange rhetoric about having multiple children.
- You guys need a TV in the bed room! ummm ok we have a TV in our bedroom but we also like to engage in marital intimacy is that ok with you.
- Don’t you know how to use birth control. Why yes my husband was actually a sex ed teacher for some time you know.
- (Now on my third pregnancy) Are you going to have your tubes tied? …I am glad that you are concerned for my reproductive organs however I think I would rather have a conversation about life altering surgery with husband… THANK YOU!
- After I found out about my second child another mother says… Oh I am so sorry…I’m like sorry for what? The miracle of life? No need to be sorry we love having our kids close in age.
All in all you can see that Kim is an every day women pregnancy hero. She isn’t concerned about what social norms say about how many children you have and how long you should wait. For me when I often feel like a baked potato warped in foil I am proud to see another lumpy pregnancy in media.
I giggle as I write this because I am in a major role reversal when it comes to hair sos calls.
Most white people run to the Internet or black friends to figure out what to do with their adoptive or bi-racial children. I’ve read fantastic stories of white patents working hard to learn the mystery of our thick tress. But here I sit on the other side of the grass and it’s not so green.
Here is the thing, my lovely chica has very fine whispy hair. Its got a bit of a curl to it but won’t stay in one place. It won’t hold hair clips or ties and head bands slip off like crazy!
What to do!!!!! I’ve tried brushing it with a little water to lay the curls down to no avail. I’ve tried frizz control and curl boasters with no luck. We wash her hair about every other day and use conditioner.
Now don’t get me wrong baby girl would be cute wearing a burlap sack but every once and a while I’ve taken her out only to notice all the other girl’s hair looks like their parents did something to it….. I’m over here like……well I tried.
Since little mama’s hair is fine it’s taking longer to grow in so there is no pony tail swag and certainly no braiding. I am certain the answer is out there. Maybe this time from a white mom who can help this black mom with some tips????